On the 15th of February I woke at 2:30 so sick I could hardly make it to the bathroom. for the next four hours I spent most of the time over the toilet throwing up. Nothing was helping and every time I took phenergan or anything else it stayed for 2 minutes and was out. I called my OB and he was in surgery all morning, but his nurse told me that if I couldn't go 2 hours with out throwing up to go on to labor and delivery. The ironic thing was that I was scheduled to go in latter that day to begin the process of induction. When I got to the hospital I was very dehydrated and as the day progressed I went into labor on my own. When our doctor came in he checked and I was to a 3.5 and 75% effaced so we decided to see what would happen. Labor pains became of steady and it seemed that we were going to have Callan with out a lot of intervention. I was excited as sick as I was. The next morning Dr. Tadvick came in to break my water. When he went to check me he said that he had shaken hands with the baby. He seemed a little concerned and went and got the sonogram. After looking at what seemed was his hand we realised that it was the babies cord. He broke my water and skilfully manipulated the cord until it was not pressed against the head. For the next few hours I laid as still as I could and finally I said I really wanted my epidural. The anaesthesiologist came up and began the procedure...all did not go well. It took 45 minutes multiple attempts and then it didn't work. Dr. Tadvick just "happened" to deliver a baby around 12 and was on the floor. he came to check on me and when he went to check progression what we felt was going to be a normal delivery became emergency very quickly.
Callan's cord had completely prolapsed and his heart rate right at that moment began to go down. Dr. Tadvick looked at me grabbed my hand and said we are going to have to do an emergency c-section right now. My head was spinning. The reality was not hitting me. My aunt was there with me and called Mom and Mick, who had gone to lunch to come back. It seemed like everything was in a flash from that moment on. They had called another Dr. to come and do the epidural again and by the time he got there it had become a general anesthetic. Mick got to the room. A hat was put on my head. Dr Tadvick grabbed both of our hands and began to pray and before I knew it I was being bounced down the hall to the OR. Once in the Or the reality of how serious things were really hit me. a nurse had asked for something and I heard Dr. Tadvick's NPR say that we did not have time for that.... All of the sudden I knew. I knew that I could loose this precious one that I had drempt of. I had convinced Mick that we needed one more in our family. I longed for this child to the point of achking aching and now I could be watching him slip from my fingers. It was more than I could even comprehend....It was at that moment that Dr. Tadvick's NPR looked at me and saw that I had just gotten it. She grabbed my hand and I honestly am not even sure what she said, but the peace that went all over me was consuming. before I knew it I was out and then waking up with BAD pain in the recovery room. Callan was here and safe and healthy.
I am amazed at how God orchestrated every thing that day. How even weeks before he began to gather every thing and every one for this moment. Three weeks earlier we were able to move Dad to Hendricks in Abilene. Mom and Dad were able to be here for this!! Dad got to hold his new grandson hours after he was born and my heart over flows. How thankful I am that He is in control and not me. How thankful we are as a family to have such an incredible doctor that went to God even before we began the event. How wonderful this crazy event was simply because God put us together with a doctor who believes that all his wisdom and skill comes from the Father and he knows that with out Him we are all nothing. We praise God for His grace!!! We praise him because He is worthy and there is no other who can compare to His glory, wonder, or excellence!!!
Oh God is good!!! He takes my ashes and makes the most beautiful gardens in my life. never have I ever know such mercy and grace and deserved it so little. I am starting to understand the expression, " Though He slay me yet I will serve Him!" What a glorious thing for Him to use the pain in our lives to His glory and prove to All those in our lives that He is supreme and deserves our all. Every day I am seeing a little more how death is the ultimate goal here. How crazy that I would try for so long to Live when all he needed was for me to be willing to die. WOW!!!
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